03/15/2023
The Beatitudes of Advertising
The average American watches TV for nearly 30 hours per week. That's 65 days of nonstop TV watching every year. By the time they graduate from high school, students will have viewed 360,000 commercials. The average 65-year-old will have watched two million commercials. Each of these commercials has been created by smart people who pack their ads with powerful images, catchy music and humor, and memorable slogans.
Most of the commercials have a primary theme: this product will give you true happiness and deep satisfaction. Few of us keep this in mind as we go about our daily lives. Advertisers want you to be dissatisfied with who you are and what you have so that they can offer their product as the solution to your deficiencies. As a result we are constantly being tempted to allow a trillion dollar industry to define us—to tempt us away from seeing ourselves the way God sees us.
Based on the worldview presented by TV commercials, here's how you might rewrite the Beatitudes spoken by Jesus 1 :
Blessed are those who fly to luxury vacation spots on tropical islands, where they lie in chaise lounge chairs, the only two people on an enormous white beach; for they shall be satisfied.
Blessed are those who drink much beer, for they shall be surrounded by carefree, football-watching buddies and highly attractive, socially-gifted women in the first half of life; and they shall be satisfied.
Blessed are those who have the latest smartphone, for they shall gaze on a screen swirling with color and shall get all the information they need just when they need it; and they shall be satisfied.
Blessed are those who have outstanding kids. Verily I say to you, highly blessed are those who have a golden Labrador retriever bounding along on that slow-motion-videoed day of playing with the kids in the park, for they shall be the envy of real families everywhere; and they shall be satisfied.
Blessed are those who are in the market for a new car. You may block out the noise of the world or surround yourself in 16 speaker stereophonic bliss. You will be able to drive your rugged truck into a cave behind a beautiful waterfall or cruise the city streets with your desirable partner to a black tie only event, while charging your phone and receiving well timed directions. All this and a low APR will bring you everything that is currently missing in your life, and you will never drive anything but this particular Luxury EV ever again.
Funny, how these beatitudes fly in the face of Jesus who announced God’s blessing on those who mourn, the meek, the merciful—the peace makers and the persecuted. Temptation comes in so many shapes and sizes. Blessed are they who have eyes to see and ears to hear it when temptation comes their way as well as the wisdom to go to God for help in turning away from it.
1 I found most of these statistics and advertising beatitudes online.
Alas, I cannot remember who the author was.
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