One More Thing with Pastor Tim Burchill 6.25.2023

Raising kids is a lot like negotiating with terrorists.

    Trying to work things out with your children, helping them see that you’ve got to work out a balance between everything you need to get done versus everything they want to get (and get done). Even teenagers who understand this are always trying to tip the scale in their favor. They can be relentless.  Raising kids is a lot like negotiating with terrorists.

    I made up this dialog, thinking I’d use it to illustrate the attitude of bargaining that is already present in our relationships (and sometimes gets projected into our relationship with God).

•    Mom, I need to get school supplies today.
o    School doesn’t start for another couple weeks, I’ve got a full schedule today, how about tomorrow?  
•    I guess so, but I don’t want to end up with the stuff after everybody else has picked through it.
o    Yeah, I get that.  Let’s plan on getting up early tomorrow morning, pick up the supplies and I’ll spring for an Egg McMuffin before I have to join a zoom call at 9:30.
•    Well not too early.  And I say we go get school supplies, grab an egg and cheese bagel at Panera’s drive thru, and then stop at the comic book store, and then head back home.
o    I suppose we can upgrade to bagels, but I don’t have time for the comic book store, especially if you’re not willing to get up extra early.
•    How about this.  I’ll get up as early as you want if you throw in the comic book store.
o    No, I know how you are with comic books, I’ll never get you out of there.
•    There’s a new Spiderman in the Spiderverse that comes out today and I don’t want to miss out on the chance to own a first edition.
o    I understand it’s important to you, but I just don’t have the time.
•    If you take me to the comic bookstore I’ll clean my room every day for a week.
o    You mean pick up, put your dirty clothes in the laundry hamper, dust, and vacuum every day for seven days.
•    Yes, if you take me to the comic book store.
o    And what happens if you don’t follow through and clean your room?
•    Then I promise I’ll clean it every day for a month.
o    If I can’t get you to clean it for a week, how in the world am I going to get you to clean it for a month?
•    You know Mom, it feels like you don’t trust me or even really love me.
o    Being a Mom means I’ve got to trust and verify.  And now that you mention it, I really don’t love you.  I’m sure a loving mother would always take her son to the comic book store whenever a new Spiderverse edition came out, and since that’s clearly not going to be me, then ergo I must not really love you.
•    MOM! I’m just asking for a teeny-tiny trip to one lousy store.  It’s too far for me to ride my bike and I don’t drive.  What choice do I have?
o    You can wait until I have more time.
•    You never let me do anything…
o    Except take you to target for school supplies, and swing by Panera’s so I can buy you an egg bagel, and then there’s the inexhaustible patience you constantly demand from your Mother.

    I hope you see my point.  In certain seasons of childhood there is nothing but negotiation going one between parents and kids.  There is negotiation at the grocery story over the advertised price vs. the posted price.  There’s negotiation with Amazon when they deliver your order to the wrong house. There is even negotiation that takes place in navigating a busy roundabout.  The danger comes when we try and negotiate with God.  He is not holding our happiness hostage and we trying to hold our faithfulness to God for ransom very rarely ends well.

    Prayer is a confessional conversation with our Creator, Redeemer, and Sustainer, marked by humility, honesty, and respect.  Maybe we ought to enjoy the fact that Jesus wanted to gather each and every one of us under his wings like a Momma hen gathers her chicks.  Jesus wants to protect and care for you and me.  What’s the point of arguing with that?